A photo montage of performing as Jesus, with brief film footage of the final scenes

I was very honoured to be given the lead role of

Jesus

in

The Poole Passion Play

“Footsteps"

Written and directed by Ann Balaam.

5th April - 9th April 2022

Performed in the beautiful St Peter’s church, Poole, Dorset

As a deeply spiritual person this is a role I have wanted to play all my life and it gave me the most profound experience I ever had as an actor. It produced in me my greatest performances and I was deeply moved and overwhelmed by the praise audience members gave me afterwards. Such comments as “Mesmerising” and “Phenomenal”. Some saying they never cry at plays, but my performance made them cry. Such high praise which also brought me to tears.

I have been asked to perform this role again in the 2024 production. The Poole Passion previously had a policy of casting a new actor as Jesus for each production, this is the first time any actor has been asked to play the role again in their 15 year history. I am deeply honoured. (See www.PoolePassionPlay.com )

With a cast of 38, a director, assistant director, stage manager and her assistant, a musician and composer, lighting technicians, plus all the marketing and administration involved in putting on such a spectacular production of this scale, The Poole Passion Play is a labour of love performed every 2 years at St Peter's church in, Poole.

The Poole Passion was founded in 2009 by Sharon Muiruri Coyne who wrote and directed its first play “Through The Eyes of A Child”, gaining momentum and great accolades each year, even featuring on BBC's 'Songs of Praise' in 2016.

In 2018, after 10 years of great work and achievement, Sharon handed the baton over to actor Ann Balaam, who previously played Mother Mary. Ann wrote a new story “Footsteps”, and each week for 6 months, directed the cast in the new play which culminated in a spectacular production which received overwhelming praise from the 350 people who came to see it on various nights in April 2022.

For myself, as an actor being cast as Jesus in this year's production, it was an honour to give many months of life to researching the role and much soul searching within myself. Being asked to play Jesus can be daunting for any actor. So many questions; 'How do I portray him?', 'How can I possibly know what he was really like?', 'What will people think if I play Him this way, or that way?'.

I watched many films and documentaries, read books and articles, all with historical, religious, spiritual and even alternative perspectives. But my questions on how to portray him were not answered. Then I realised the answer was inside me all along... 'Let go, and let God'. Let go of thinking, analysing, worrying and fears, and just empty myself to be an open vessel for love, and nothing else, to pour through in the performance.

Little did I realise that I would not only be guided, but carried through it. Each night I felt I was enveloped in a bubble of beautiful energy and I was being asked to let it flow.

The cast was a mixture of experienced actors and beginners. Some with small parts and just one line, others with much more dialogue and even the occasional monologue to perform.

Each week from October to April, everyone worked diligently on the play, regardless of how large or small their role, from the technical lighting and music crew, to the director and assistant director, producer and stage manager and all the cast. People from all backgrounds and beliefs, all coming together with a passion to perform...the Passion.

Such dedication from the cast and production team produced a play that had audiences 'mesmerised', to use their own words. The feedback forms the audience filled in after each performance were flooded with praise.

For myself, I performed a level of acting I have never achieved before and this was accompanied by superb performances by Clive Balaam as Pontius Pilate. As I looked into his eyes, as Jesus before Pilate, I could see Pilate's lust for power and yet his eyes were unable to betray his true feelings that Jesus was a man of love and peace as he declares 'I find no fault with this man, this man is innocent!', and the love emerges through his own eyes, dissolving his encased heart.

Then there was Judas, played beautifully by Tim Drage. Portraying Judas's love for Jesus whilst being torn between his heart and his mind as he releases Jesus to his destiny, in a touching moment as Jesus says 'Be quick about it, my friend.'

The same internal conflict portrayed wonderfully by Richard Brown as King Herod, contrasted by the warm and loving performances of Mary of Magdelena and Mary mother of Jesus, played by Manina Trickett and Janet Burrows. Plus a heart wrenching monologue by Ann Bessant as Mary mother of James and John, as she laments the crucifixion of Jesus.

There was a very notable appearance by actor Steve McCarthy, who is in fact blind, and performed Chief Priest Caiaphas with great power alongside Roy de la Mer, Russell Herridge and Robert Southam as the accompanying power hungry priests.

The story of 'Footsteps' is centred around a group of tourists in modern day Jerusalem who visit various sacred sites and are transported back in time to see Jesus and gain inspiration from his wisdom, and ultimately witness his crucifixion and resurrection.

The play, exquisitely woven together by Ann Balaam, allowed for these two timelines to occasionally interact, including a tender moment as Jesus gives a blessing to tourist 'Sam', played wonderfully by Beryl Barianna.

The production team were also called upon to play cameo roles in the play with director Ann Balaam, producer Jan Miller, stage manager Hannah Stockley and assistant director Stuart Glossop playing tourists to open the play with a wonderful combination of scripted and improvised acting. Alongside Passion Play newcomers Clair James and her son Noah, Sally Bedborough, Joe Burgess and Caleb Lockett, all performing their roles with such apparent ease and professionalism, due in no small measure to their months of dedication.

Stuart also produced a powerful moment as a Guardian Spirit visiting Jesus at his moment of anguish in the garden of Gethsemane and a fleeting, but poignant meeting at his resurrection.

Stuart himself played Jesus in the 2014 production and on one evening we were also joined by actor Jamie Derrick, who played Jesus in 2018, this time in cameo roles as disciple and a Roman Soldier.

Playing Jesus, for me, was the most demanding and hugely enriching experience of my acting career. A role that requires gentle love, moments of anger and anguish, the physical and emotional pain of being on the cross and seeing your loved ones below in despair, and then to release it all and emerge resurrected, at peace and in love with all things.

To look into the eyes of my fellow actors, people who I barely knew beforehand, and see only love in them, as this is how I felt guided to portray Him.

Before each performance I would immerse myself in the solitude of the passageway at the back of the church, for over half an hour before the play started each night, moving my consciousness out of my analysing mind and into my heart. Releasing all fears of what people would think of me and becoming an open vessel for what ever level of love could come through.

Prior to the first performance I couldn't sleep at night, and yet the play went superbly well, with audience enthralled. However this led to another sleepless from the exhilaration! The same on the next night. So, by the time of the third performance, I had gone for 3 nights without sleep and I was mentally and emotionally drained. I arrived at the dressing room, slumped in my chair without an ounce of energy, worrying how I could keep the same level of performance for that evening. I closed my eyes and called to Jesus, I felt inspired to use his name in his own Aramaic language, Yeshua. I asked, 'Yeshua, please help me find the energy and concentration to portray you this evening as beautifully as you would like me to.' Then, 2 minutes before my entrance, as I stood in the wings, an energy swept through my body, not excitement, not adrenaline, but a warm and gentle energy that dissolved my exhaustion and worries. The energy remained with me through the entire play and I gave my best performance of the week so far. It was as if I was being carried that evening, much like the famous 'Footsteps in the Sand' poem.

Few actors are blessed to be offered the role of Jesus, and I was blessed not only to play Him, but to perform with actors and a production team in a very supportive and encouraging environment, led by the skill and unerring patience of director Ann Balaam in the beautiful St Peter's church, thanks to the kindness of Rev Mike Trotman, and then performing in a production that, according to the feedback from the audiences, touched them deeply.